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Keith Perdue posted a condolence
Having met her only a few times I only knew her through one of her daughters, Barbara. Barbara told me much about her mom, her unselfish giving to her when she was in desperate need and her mom's tremendous love for all of her family. I know she raised Barbara to be non-judgemental of others as she was, and to always look for the good in people, even when their behavior sometimes was not of the loving nature. I also know how much Barbara meant to her, she was the one who gave so much time and energy to her mom, not only when she was in her last weeks of life, but during the last several years. In the end Doreen acknowledged to Barbara just how much she meant to her and how sorry she was for not telling her sooner. She received tremendous strength to face her death through Barbara's loving care and attention. I'm lucky to have witnessed such a loving relationship as that between Doreen and Barbara. She will be missed, but forever loved by her daughter.
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Barbara Terry posted a condolence
She loved to please everyone. She always was smiling. She loved animals more than people, thou she loved people. Cat's were her favorite, and she had many. Allot of her kids would leave a cat behind when leaving home, me included. She loved dogs too. We'd walk the dogs along Pleasure Point after dinners. Or during the day we'd take them to the Yacht Harbor. She loved to travel, and did allot of that. She's been more places than I can think of. HA, Australia, New Zealand, Europe, Scotland, England, most of the US and Canada. She & I would go to concerts together, go shopping together, and I'd always come over to clean the pool, and go w/ her to OSH to get Chlorine, and Acid, all the stuff needed to keep a pool clean and a jacuzzi. We had many laughs just floating in the pool. We both loved the water and tans. She would stand in the pool, and take the pool "skimmer' that we named "Oscar" and water her plants, so she wouldn't have to get out of the pool, and still get tan. We went to Reno many times in honor of my dad and her husband Dr. Howard R Terry Jr. He loved to gamble. But she & I just couldn't do it. So we'd play $20, and then walk around and look, and shop, and then find the pool, and lay in the sun. We always stopped at the Nut Tree on the way up and back, to have their fruit salad. And she cooked so much, she created her own version of the fruit salad, which I loved. Because of my health problems, I got to have allot of time w/ her after my dad died. I worked until 95, and my heart gave out, so I had to be on disability. She was getting very crippled w/ RA. And needed help w/ shopping, and ordering things. So we would go over to ea. other's house and spend time together. She honestly is the best person I've ever known, and I don't say that from being her daughter. She knew how to forgive. She had compassion. And kindness, and had gone thru trials in her life. So she knew that people do mess up and she loved them anyway. She always said "You are the only one who knows me" to me, and she was right. All her other children were busy w/ their lives , as they should be. But because I couldn't work anymore, I had time, and I made sure I spent it w/ her. I learned that lesson early on w/ my DAD. I helped my mom take care of him when he was dying. So I had allot of regrets. I didn't want to have any, not knowing that I would no matter what. I loved her so, and she loved me, and she was non judgmental. She knew what was really going on w/ ea. of her kids, and she'd tell me how much certain things hurt her, and her own regrets. I believe she was really shocked when she could barely walk , that everyone forgot to invite her out. She & I would be on the phone together, min. 2x a day. A.M & P.M. Sometimes more. Because when a person is disabled, it can get very lonely. And people tend to think you don't care to go out, but you can't. She felt allot of her family should have come over often, and was very disappointed. We talked about everything. And it was a wonderful relationship. What bothered her the most was her kids saying bad things about ea. other, and the bad things weren't even true. She'd say "Why do they do that?" I'd say "I don't know mom. I guess people just like to blame others rather than look at themselves". She'd say "Well that's just silly and stupid. Because all that's been said, isn't true. Or if any of it's true, they should love enough to have compassion and forgive, leave it in the past and move on". I'd agree w/ her. But when it started happening to her, when she was really ill, she always "loved" her kids, no matter what. Even if she "didn't like them". 'I can love them and not like what they are doing". I know I let her down when I was in my early 20's. And it hurt her badly, and my dad too. But we talked at length and forgave ea. other. That was what was so special about her. She just was "love". When ever I was w/ her I felt "totally loved". And she knew everything about me, and she was the only compassionate person, besides my Dad, in our family to help out, when my heart stopped. So when she became ill, there was NO question in my heart, about taking care of her. To me, it was an Honor. And I knew she knew this. We spent every day doing 'fun" things, unless she was too tired. Then we'd lay and watch TV and have a roaring fire going, w/ our kitty cats next to us. I don't know how I'll go on w/o her. But I know she'd want me to do my best, so I am. I was so worried, because 3 yrs straight of helping, paying the bills, buying the groceries, and ordering the medications, along w/ living and watching her decline, took it's toll. I lost all my friends, and had another heart attack. But I was willing to die to help her. I only wish the rest of the family could have felt that way toward her. Because she was very saddened, and dismayed at the lack of caring. But I'd tell her "they just want to continue their lives". She'd say "they just don't love me. Love is where you help family members no matter what". I really couldn't disagree w/ her. It's only been 3 mo's since she's been gone, and I still can not believe that I can't talk w/ her, or go over the hill and goof off, go fishing or go shopping, to a concert. We did just about everything. I love her so much, and I pray to God that somehow, some way her family comes to realize that love is about compassion, giving, and taking, loving and forgiving, talking and listening. W/o all that, there is no truth, and the love falls away into bitterness. She just wanted her family to love ea. other. I do. I love all my siblings. And I forgive them all for all they have said. Because who am I to judge? I love you mom, and it seems like just yesterday I was holding your hand , and giggling w/ you. You know I'll be seeing you. Love Barbara (Your sweet one)
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Debbie Akkerdaas posted a condolence
I know I'm late with this. But I have to say what a love Mrs. Terry was. And thanks to her daughter Joanne her life was made so much better. Joanne was always at her moms side. Know Mrs. Terry loved all her kids but will always know Joanne was the one she could rely one. Let the truth be told. We will miss you Mrs. Terry.
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Barbara Terry posted a condolence
She loved being kind, and never wanted to hurt anyone's feelings. She was the most gentle soul I've ever met, and I've had the pleasure of sharing my time on earth as her daughter. I know I let her down at times, in my younger years, but she always forgave. And we became more than daughter and mother. We were best friends for the last 15 yrs. Her generosity, and understanding of each of us kids, was overwhelming, and I felt I could go to her w/ anything, even the hardest things. And I did. And she helped. When no one else would. God put her here to raise 5 children, all very special in their own way, and I love them all, as she did. She showed such quiet courage under pain and distress, that she gave this gift to me. When I thought I couldn't move one more minute, I'd look at her, and see her strength, and I'd ask for the strength to be provided to me, and it came. She took in and loved the friends of her kids, and knew all of them by name. She'd sit for hours listening to the tales of ea. child. I can't think of anyone I'd rather have as a mom, and I miss her greatly. But I told her, "I'll see you later", and she smiled. Her smile could light up a room. And it did. So mom, I'll see you later, and I love you! You know that, I know. And I know you love me. We talked about it too many times to not know. I already miss your voice, and your calls. But I know you are watching. And I WILL see you later :-)
Your loving, sweet daughter,
Barbara
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Debbie Knight Hawley posted a condolence
To the Family, I am very sorry for your loss. May you find comfort and love in this time of sorrow.
I have many happy memories of your Mom, she was precious...
Debbie Knight Hawley
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Rhoda Mackenzie posted a condolence
Doreen loved life. She loved animals and for that I honor her with deep affection. She will be sorely missed. May she rest in eternal peace.
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